"You will be pleased to know that I personally supervised our production team as they meticulously printed your garment and delicately hand stitched it with the very finest cotton threads from far away lands. I then observed as it was given a luxurious wash in the finest of Italian stone baths filled with our secret recipe of 7 essential softening oils, to inspire feelings of comfort and tranquillity when wearing your most cherished Après Vélo item.
It was with great delight that I witnessed our highly trained expert from Japan check the seams and quality of your prized possession so that when you wear it for all the world to see, you look magnificent and represent our noble sport of cycling with "cool" credibility. I watched as they meticulously inserted our care label and canvas swing tag, and then delicately pressed and folded your garment. Your order was then carried proudly aloft to our packaging temple, where our white-gloved staff gently packed your "work of art".
I could only smile as it was collected by six fine cycle couriers resplendent in Après Vélogear. The clattering of 100 cowbells & cheering from staff was deafening, as your order was cycled away to our depot for collection by our transport company. We are blissfully exhausted, but look forward to hopefully inspiring you once again with our passion for all things cycling.
Thank-you once again, we truly appreciate that it is you, our customer, that puts the carb-rich food on our table."
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